The Dark Side of Red Six: Hella Savings

After spending nearly a decade dwelling in the same cramp apartment, Heather and I recently bought a house.  Overall it has been an odd experience in “adulting” for me. In the apartment there was a carefree attitude towards appliances, roofs, lawns and plumbing. Now when walking up to the front door I find myself side eyeing the lawn and whispering a silent prayer of thanks to Crom for the neighbors whose landscaping is haphazard and overgrown. I fear my next door neighbors finding out how very little I know of mulch or what constitutes as a weed. Then once inside, my nerves twist during high winds (which we have often in Oklahoma) or whenever the toilet is flushed, fully convinced that costly repairs might be needed at any moment. I am happy for the change, but long for the days of stress free apartment living.

Buying appliances is one more area that has given me all the anxious “feels”. I love getting those “out of box deals” major retail stores offer but then I always worry that there is something seriously wrong hidden, just waiting to reveal itself days after the store’s warranty expires. I have tried more than once to cozy up to the sales person with a bump of my elbow and say “Between you and me, what’s wrong with it? I’ll still buy it but ya know.. whats the mark down in price really for?”.

This ploy absolutely never works. Not once. It actually has the opposite effect, much like a fish asking “Ok.. the worm you have on the line looks tasty.. and I’m gonna bite.. but.. is there a hook in it? Be honest.” to which the fisherman answers with a wolf’s smile “No, Mr. Fish. Nothing in that worm but more worms, even tastier worms.”.
Buying discounted appliances just smacks of modern consumer Lovecraft to me and nothing made me happier than seeing a refrigerator fit for C’thulu.

Red Six to Golden Corral : @Red6toGC
Nick Johnson: @RoboticalNick
Caleb Haldane: @CalebHaldane
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The Dark Side of Red Six: Perils of The Podcast

As you wish, it’s time for another Dark Side of Red Six webcomic. This week we join the dashing couple from The Princess Bride as they take a wrong turn from the Fire Swamp and descend into the Perils of the Red Six Podcast. I am in love with Mathew’s take on Wesley and Buttercup stumbling upon a Raptor sex party. The especially naughty pair in the background get me every time!

Raptor Sex Parties are back, y’all!

Red Six to Golden Corral : @Red6toGC
Nick Johnson: @RoboticalNick
Caleb Haldane: @CalebHaldane
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The Dark Side of Red Six: Heaven

Apologies up front for the comic coming out late this week! It will never happen again. OK. That is undoubtedly a lie, but I hope to at least make any tardiness in the future a very rare occurrence.

My personal version of heaven would be playing a game of whack-a-mole on the heads of ‘Grammar Nazi’. That might seem very aggressive but I am just being honest. Now, it’s possible I have a particularly large chip on my shoulder from all the times Caleb has corrected my poor grammar of “me and Person” to the proper “Person and I”. An endless tug of war between my poor grammar and his joy in correcting it and I really do not know who will break first. Will I improve my poor grammar or will Caleb tire of correcting it. I know the answer, and thus this comic was born.

Red Six to Golden Corral : @Red6toGC
Nick Johnson: @RoboticalNick
Caleb Haldane: @CalebHaldane
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The Dark Side of Red Six: Final Friday

Final FantasyWhat happens when the world of Friday the 13th and Final Fantasy collide? The Final Friday is born.
I have logged 100+ hours on Final Fantasy 15 so it was only a matter of time before it made its way into a comic.It also gives me a chance to work out my Tonberry frustrations. It was a mob that was always a standout from the previous games but were known for being the epitome of slow but deadly. How do you translate that into a fast paced free roam game? You Yoda the shit out of them and “spinning blade of death they become, hrm!”. They are the only encounter that causes me dread. I have slain turtles made of mountains. I have crushed giant robots. I fear the robed toads of doom. We can all agree though that classically speaking Tonberry was the Jason Voorhees of Final Fantasy.  And I can never skip a chance to kill Caleb in a strip.

Red Six to Golden Corral : @Red6toGC
Nick Johnson: @RoboticalNick
Caleb Haldane: @CalebHaldane
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The Dark Side Of Red Six: Master Vader

Welcome back adventurers!

This weeks comic was actually our very first comic written. I personally think it’s really sweet to imagine Vader indulging in his artistic passion for drawing and adapting smoothly to his new life as a mostly mechanical cyborg kill-bot for the Dark Side. I really loved Mathew’s take on Vader actually having facial expressions and not just a static mask. Funny note on this one, the first panel had some room left for Vader to be doing some “heavy breathing” as he drew his favorite pair of robot boobs, but there is a surprising amount of conflict residing on the internet on how to properly write the onomatopoeia for Darth’s signature breath. We decided to go with what is done in some of the comic publications and omit it altogether. But here are a few examples that we found online…

“KtrrrRRrr … Chooo…. KtrrrRRrr… Chooo”  (Chew or Cho?)

Hwooooooo Haaaa….Hwooooooo Haaaa” (Ok. This one, just comes off as Al Pacino from Scent of a Woman)

“shkssssshhh shksssshhhhh” (Definitely a flat tire)

Kriisshhhh…… Whoorrreeeee…..” (This one slays me.. I mean.. is he calling Chris a Whore??)

 

Red Six to Golden Corral : @Red6toGC
Nick Johnson: @RoboticalNick
Caleb Haldane: @CalebHaldane
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The Dark Side of Red Six: Of Dungeons and Dragons

I think every table top role playing group has that one “member”, the one who is all too willing to help the group immerse into the fantasy. I have definitely been that guy for a couple of play groups. All you need to play is some friends and some rule books (and the rule books are optional, imo) but that was rarely enough for me when I was Dungeon Mastering. I have employed many tactics to help the players “get into the mood” from playing Fantasy Adventure movie soundtracks, dimmed the lights and lit multiple candles for eerie illumination, provided maps to dungeons on coffee soaked paper with burned edges to “age” the paper, provided food that I felt was appropriate for adventurers to eat (instead of pizza/mountain dew it was cheese/Hawaiian rolls and cider) and on one rare occasion I showed up in costume. It’s possible in the near future I will be getting to DM some Pathfinder for Caleb and Gal’s group. Running a role playing group can take a lot of time and effort but the end result can make memories that you will carry your whole life. Not all of them, but you’ll damn sure be more likely to remember the fate of your character when said fate is being decided by a chubby guy in an executioners cloak lit by candle light with Braveheart playing in the background!


The Dark Side of Red Six: Trial and Error

We are not saying that Batman must surely have piles of failed Robins hidden away in the Batcave. But, if I was Commissioner Gordon, I would definitely take a look behind the walls and under the floorboards of Wayne Manor. I have a hard time buying that every sidekick he took on was successful. That Wayne Cemetery has a lot of headstones to be a family plot, Bruce! Caleb had a great tag on this comic that I love, “the Metropolis Orphanage”, slays me. This idea that the B-man is going to Superman’s city to ‘trial and error’ orphans to be his protege. It’s a dick move, Batman, a real dick move.

-Nick


The Dark Side of Red Six: Mario’s Fairy Tale

This week our comic takes a look at that grim fairy tale meeting between Mario and Princess Peach. What a story our hero has to tell his grandchildren, how he gleefully stomped his way through King Koopa’s army, breaking necks and squishing the far inferior foes that stood in his way. Through fire, blood, and guts our Mario finally gets his “meet cute” moment with his “damsel in distress cliche” as aromatic sulfur heightens the senses and the screams of a black magic wielding King Koopa slowly burning to death in the lapping waves of lava set a most memorable and enchanting mood.


The Dark Side of Red Six: Conan Exiles

This is our very first comic to be released under the Red Six to Golden Corral banner, and we started with the lowest low low basement brow joke we had written. I swear it really is the only dick joke penned for the comics so far but after seeing all the videos for Conan Exiles on Youtube, how could we resist the opportunity. Be relieved though because the original joke written was a play on the famous Conan quote about “two snakes, facing each other” and that would have just been a real awkward first step! It really is surreal to see a likeness of yourself used in a comic. I really have to applaud Matthew Brendle (the very talented artist who has done a great job in these strips as well as previous works for us and is available for hire at his Facebook page) for doing such a fine capture of my thin legs, robust belly and southern slopping “pecks”!

The plan for now is to release these on the first and fifteenth of every month. We really hope you enjoy them as much as we do creating them.
Until next time!
-Nick